9 tools for decision making when you feel stuck

Start here: Clarify the decision (before you pick a tool)

Before you reach for any decision-making tool, you need to make the decision smaller and clearer. Most indecision isn’t about not knowing what to do. It’s about not knowing what you’re actually deciding.

Think of this step as one of the simplest techniques for decision making: clarify first, then choose a tool.

Define the decision in one sentence

Write it down. Not in your head. On paper or in a note.

Example:

• Not: “Should I change jobs?”
• Better: “Should I accept the offer at Company B or stay at my current job for another year?”

The clearer the question, the easier the answer.

Name the type of decision

Not all decisions need the same level of thought. Figure out what kind of decision this is:

• Reversible vs. irreversible. Can you undo this if it doesn’t work out?
• Low stakes vs. high stakes. Will this decision matter in a year?
• Personal vs. business. Does this affect just you, or does it affect your team, family, or finances?

Matching your effort to the decision type saves you from overthinking small things and under-thinking big ones.

Set a deadline

No deadline means no decision. Pick a date. Even if it’s arbitrary. “I’ll decide by Friday” is better than “I’ll decide when I feel ready.”

Decide what “good enough” means

You don’t need the perfect choice. You need a choice that meets your minimum requirements and doesn’t create problems you can’t handle.

Ask yourself: “What would make this decision good enough, even if it’s not perfect?”

Mini technique: “What decision am I actually making?”

Sometimes the decision you think you’re making isn’t the real one.

You think you’re deciding: “Should I start this business?” You’re actually deciding: “Am I willing to feel uncertain for six months while I figure this out?”

Get clear on what you’re really choosing, and the decision gets easier.

Tools for decision making vs. intuition: What’s the difference?

Intuition is pattern recognition. It’s your brain pulling from past experiences and giving you a feeling about what to do. It works great when you have experience, when you’re calm, and when the decision is familiar.

But tools for decision making work when intuition doesn’t. They help you make clear, defendable choices using logic, criteria, and frameworks instead of waiting for a feeling that might never come.

You’re not replacing intuition. You’re just using something more reliable when your gut goes quiet.

Tool #1: The 3-criteria filter (fast, simple, repeatable)

Best for: Everyday decisions, too many options.

When you’ve got five, ten, or twenty options and your brain is overloaded, use this.

How it works

1. Pick your top 3 must-have criteria. Not 10. Just 3.
2. Score each option 1 to 5 on each criterion.
3. Total the score and rank them.

Example: Choosing a new apartment.

• Criteria: Distance to work (1-5), rent fits budget (1-5), natural light (1-5)
• Option A: 4 + 5 + 3 = 12
• Option B: 3 + 4 + 5 = 12
• Option C: 5 + 3 + 2 = 10

If two options tie, you either need a tiebreaker criterion or you can flip a coin—but only after you confirm both options meet your must-haves. If they’re genuinely equal, either choice is fine.

Add-on: Deal-breaker check

Before you score anything, eliminate options that fail a must-have.

If you need a place that allows pets and Option C doesn’t, it’s out. No scoring needed.

Quick template

My 3 criteria are: ___, ___, ___.
My deal-breaker is: ___.
The best option is: ___.

Tool #2: Weighted decision matrix (when choices are close)

Best for: Choosing between strong options (job offers, vendors, big purchases).

This is the 3-criteria filter’s older, more serious sibling. Use it when the stakes are higher and the options are legitimately close.

How it works

1. List your criteria down the left side.
2. List your options across the top.
3. Weight each criterion (1 to 10) based on how important it is to you.
4. Score each option on each criterion (1 to 5).
5. Multiply the score by the weight, then total each column.

Example: Choosing between two job offers.

Criteria	Weight	Job A (score × weight)	Job B (score × weight)
Salary	8	4 × 8 = 32	5 × 8 = 40
Work-life balance	9	5 × 9 = 45	3 × 9 = 27
Growth opportunities	7	3 × 7 = 21	4 × 7 = 28
Commute time	5	4 × 5 = 20	2 × 5 = 10
Total		118	105

Job A wins, even though job B has higher salary, because work-life balance matters more to you.

Tip: Include one “future cost” criterion

Don’t just evaluate what you get. Evaluate what it will cost you in time, stress, or maintenance.

A cheap car that breaks down every month isn’t actually cheap.

Tool #3: Regret minimization (the “future you” test)

Best for: Life choices, scary moves, long-term paths.

This is one of the most powerful techniques for decision making when you’re stuck between playing it safe and taking a risk.

How it works

Imagine yourself 1 year from now and 5 years from now.

Ask:

• Which choice is more likely to create regret?
• Which regret would be easier to live with?
• What story do I want to be able to tell myself later?

Example:

• You’re deciding whether to leave a stable job to start a business.
• In 5 years, will you regret not trying? Or will you regret leaving stability?
• Which version of regret feels more tolerable?

Write a letter from future you

Take five minutes and write a short paragraph from future you explaining why you made this choice.

“I chose to start the business because I knew I’d always wonder what could have happened if I didn’t try. Even if it fails, I’ll know I gave it a real shot.”

vs.

“I stayed at my job because I wasn’t ready to risk my family’s financial security. I can always start a side project, but I can’t undo losing our savings.”

Both are valid. The exercise just helps you see which regret you can actually live with.

Quick template

In 5 years, I’ll regret: ___.
The regret I can live with is: ___.
Future me would say: ___.

Tool #4: Pre-mortem (spot problems before they happen)

Best for: Big projects, launches, hiring, moving, partnerships.

Most people do a post-mortem after something goes wrong. A pre-mortem helps you spot problems before you commit.

How it works

1. Pretend the decision went badly. The project failed. The hire didn’t work out. The move was a disaster.
2. List all the reasons it failed. Be blunt. Don’t sugarcoat.
3. Turn each reason into a prevention step.

Example: Deciding whether to hire a new team member.

Pre-mortem:

• They didn’t have the skills we thought they did.
• They didn’t fit the team culture.
• We didn’t have clear expectations set.
• We rushed the process because we were desperate.

Prevention:

• Add a skills test to the interview process.
• Have them meet the team before we make an offer.
• Write a 90-day plan before they start.
• Set a minimum timeline for hiring, even if we’re understaffed.

Now you’ve got a risk list and a mitigation plan. You’re not guessing anymore.

Quick template

This failed because: ___.
To prevent that, I will: ___.

Tool #5: 10-10-10 (cut through emotional noise)

Best for: Anxiety-driven indecision.

When your emotions are loud and your gut is quiet, this tool helps you separate short-term discomfort from long-term impact.

How it works

Ask yourself: How will I feel about this decision in…

• 10 minutes?
• 10 months?
• 10 years?

Example: You’re deciding whether to quit a job you hate.

• 10 minutes: Terrified. Relieved. Embarrassed.
• 10 months: Proud I took the risk. Probably stressed but building something better.
• 10 years: Grateful I didn’t waste another decade in a place that drained me.

If the 10-minute feeling is bad but the 10-month and 10-year feelings are good, that tells you something.

If all three timelines feel bad, that’s useful information too.

Optional: Add “10 days”

If the decision timeline is shorter, swap in “10 days” instead of one of the other timeframes.

Quick template

In 10 minutes: ___.
In 10 months: ___.
In 10 years: ___.
The timeline that matters most is: ___.

Tool #6: Opportunity cost list (what you’re really saying no to)

Best for: Overcommitment, choosing what to drop, priority decisions.

Every yes is a no to something else. This tool makes that visible.

How it works

For each option, write:

• If I choose this, what can I not do?
• What will this cost me in time, money, focus, energy?

Then pick the option with the best trade-off, not the most excitement.

Example: You’re deciding whether to take on a big freelance project.

If I say yes:

• I can’t work on my own business for three months.
• I’ll be stressed and tired every evening.
• I’ll make $15,000 but lose momentum on my long-term goal.

If I say no:

• I lose $15,000 short-term.
• I keep my evenings and weekends.
• I can finish building my own product and launch it in two months.

Now you’re not just deciding based on what sounds good. You’re deciding based on what you’re actually willing to give up.

Quick template

If I say yes, I lose: ___.
If I say no, I lose: ___.
I’m choosing to lose: ___.

Tool #7: The “one-way door / two-way door” test (speed up decisions)

Best for: Perfectionism and slow decisions.

Not all decisions deserve the same amount of time. This tool helps you figure out how much effort to put in.

How it works

Two-way door decisions (reversible): Decide quickly, test, adjust.

• Trying a new morning routine
• Changing your content schedule
• Testing a new tool or software
• Ordering something with a return policy

One-way door decisions (hard to undo): Slow down, gather more data, ask for feedback.

• Accepting a job offer
• Moving to a new city
• Hiring someone
• Getting married

Match your effort to the decision type. Don’t spend three weeks deciding on something you can undo in a day.

Tool #8: Small experiments (when you need data, not feelings)

Best for: When intuition is silent because you lack real experience.

Sometimes your gut isn’t talking because you don’t have enough information. You need to test the decision in real life, not in your head.

How it works

Run a low-risk test:

• Try before you buy. Rent the equipment before you invest in it.
• Pilot project. Do the work for one client before you commit to a niche.
• One-week trial schedule. Try waking up at 5am for a week before you decide it’s your new lifestyle.
• Mini version of the commitment. Volunteer in the field before you go back to school for it.

Decide based on results, not guesses.

Ask yourself: “What’s the smallest test that gives real information?”

You don’t need to commit to the full thing. You just need enough data to make a more informed choice.

Quick template

The smallest test I can run is: ___.
It will take: ___.
Success looks like: ___.
After the test, I will decide by: ___.

Tool #9: Values stack rank (when both options are “good”)

Best for: Choosing between two options that both seem right, but for different reasons.

Right now your tools are logic-heavy, which works great for most decisions. But sometimes your gut is quiet because you’re facing a values conflict, not a logic problem.

How it works

1. Pick 5 values that matter in this decision. Examples: health, freedom, stability, growth, family, creativity, money, impact, rest.
2. Rank them 1 to 5 for this season of your life. (Not forever. Just right now.)
3. Choose the option that protects your top 1 to 2 values.

Example: You’re choosing between two job offers.

Your values for this season:

1. Financial stability (you just had a baby)
2. Work-life balance (you’re burned out)
3. Growth opportunities
4. Creativity
5. Prestige

Job A: Higher salary, strict hours, less creative, stable company.
Job B: Lower salary, flexible schedule, creative projects, startup risk.

Job A protects your top 2 values right now. That doesn’t mean job B is wrong. It just means it’s not right for this season.

Quick template

My top 5 values right now are: ___, ___, ___, ___, ___.
The option that protects my top 2 is: ___.